(That’s a hypothetical question, of course)

I hate to draw attention to these things, but the Sunday gossip pages reached a new low in the last week, with reports on:

a) an unknown “celebrity” apparently thinking that 15 was old enough for a prostitute he allegedly purchased services off, and,

b) the release of Philip Sturm from prison, after serving time for five counts of sexual violation.

Both were reported in the slightly breathy tones that the papers reserve for reporting of other earth-shattering events such as Charlotte Dawson’s hair extensions; it seems to have totally passed both of them by that both stories concern themselves with rape and sexual violation, which under NZ law is viewed second only to murder, not to mention any moral or ethical concerns.

So what is it with these gossip pages? Why do Wilson & Horton and Fairfax only publish them in Auckland? (when I lived in Wellington, my flatmates and I enjoyed our weekly savaging of Sunday magazine; they were horrified when I, on my move north, reported back to them on the travesty that is About Town). Are we all really that narcissistic that circulation figures in Auckland demand the inclusion of pages where we might see a photo of someone we know, or even ourselves? Or there is a rash of advertisers in Auckland demanding that their ad go next to an item that light heartedly describes the japes of a 15 year old prostitute?